Speak…No one hears a peep…
Inside myself, I fall asleep;
Tired of trying to explain.
I am but a migraine,
Which hurts too much to think.
Mute…No one cares a hoot…
Inside myself, there’s a dispute.
Screams and wishes to explain;
Yet, no one hears a migraine…
They hurt too much to say.
K. Aldaya, 8/27/19
Picture: By: Carolina Heza at Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/0lD4hF1fBv0
You love to laugh at my misfortune.
To watch me suffer and cry.
When I’m hurt or sick, you look away,
And wait ’round for me to die.
You’ve never asked me about myself.
Years, and I’m still the outcast.
You’d rather make up lies and spread them,
Then to get the truth at last.
You’ve stolen from me… Gave me silence.
Ignored, screamed, and called me names.
You’ve never cared how much pain you cause,
And replay those same mind-games.
You know I have no family to care.
There’s a target on my back.
No one will stand up in my defense.
Orphans are soft to attack.
I wonder if you’ll ever fathom,
The use of introspection.
I doubt it, for as it has been said,
Monsters will not stare at their own reflection,..
It scares them too much.
K. Aldaya, 5/19/19
Picture: By: Max Bender on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/XIVDN9cxOVc
Eyes look, yet they never see.
They draw pictures,
Yet none show me.
In black and white I hide behind,
In the shadows.
In blurred lines.
Eyes look, yet they never see.
They skim the surface,
Like a stone set free,
To fly ‘cross the surface of a lake,
Then sink carelessly,
Leaving solitude in it’s wake.
Eyes look, yet they never see.
You glance my way,
Yet you don’t see me.
I’m the phantom in the corner of the eye,
That waves hello,
Then walks on by.
Eyes look, yet they never see.
Time passes by,
As you pass me.
I am nothing…a ghost…a mirage,
That haunts your eye,
In perfect camouflage.
Eyes look, yet they never see.
They draw pictures,
Yet none show me.
In black and white I hide behind,
In the shadows.
In blurred lines.
K. Aldaya, 3/28/19
Picture: Original Source Unknown; http://favim.com/image/4055695/#
You talk to me and I listen.
You smile,…yet I feel sad.
I talk, and you don’t hear a thing;
The connection’s always bad.
You look at me, and I at you.
You move, and I stand still.
I see you, yet you don’t see me;
And I fear you never will.
K. Aldaya, 10/23/18
Picture: https://www.shutterstock.com/video/clip-28677217-phone-receiver-hanging-off-hook-public-box
Here I am so lonely.
No one really cares.
I’m just out here surviving.
Why is it no one dares?
To talk to me, or know,
Who I am or long to be?
Or simply say hello,
When they walk on by me?
I’m tired of surviving,
Of doing the right things.
Of saying hello and smiling;
For me, no one does these things.
And yet, they are so simple;
I do them every day.
Though I doubt yet one would call to me,
If I were to walk away.
If I turned and walked,
Up the stairs some more.
And to the top emerged.
And loudly closed the door.
And walked slowly each step…
Tip-tap with the clock.
And softly closed my eyes.
Pondering the tick and tock.
And as the wind,
From the North,
A cold and icy thing,…
Blew, I would step forth,
—-No more to sing.
K. Aldaya, 1/19/14
Picture: “Girl on the Edge” by Tom Ryaboi: http://www.tomryaboi.com/; http://camyx.com/exposure/2013/11/tom-ryaboi-atop-skyscrapers/
My Soul is a Lock Without a Key 