470. It’s Only Fair

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They say that life,…it isn’t fair.

That the best of us die young;

And men who live until old age,

Still die with songs unsung.

Yet tears give life to the Earth,

And the dead find a place to lie.

You raped me, but it’s alright;

‘Cause I,… I watched you die.

It’s said that there is a plan,…

Some meaning to it all.

Yet I find it hard to sleep at night,

As people rise and fall.

Will anyone remember you?

Will they laugh or will they cry?

You raped me, and it’s not alright,

Yet I…, maybe I should feel glad,…

For I,…I watched you die.

Did the angels ever get to fly or is it just a tale,

Told by early men who died by both monster and sail?

I do not know much of it,

Though I fear it’s all comforting lie.

Those who hurt, rape, and kill,…

One day they too will die.

Is death the great equalizer?

In death is all made right?

Will the criminals and the victims,

Go together toward the light?

All men are born victims,

And even criminals cry;

And even though you hurt me,

I didn’t want you to die.

K. Aldaya, 3/24/19

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465. The Proof’s Missing It’s Pudding

What if in my honesty,

I am not believed?

If someone were to question my reality?

Can truth ever be received,

Without proof and the third-degree?

What if I misword my speech,

And what’s heard’s not meant?

Should I remain silent or cry, plead, and beseech…

The Gods, who will stay absent,

As my honor flies out of reach?

What if in my honesty,

I am not believed?

Am I the fool for truly speaking openly,

Of the plight of the bereaved?

With no corpse to see, and nod: acknowledgingly;

For in acceptance of the truth…

Men want proof…..They all want proof.

K. Aldaya, 1/18/19

464. Never-known

“No one wants me”, was said,

To no one in particular.

Ah, hiding is a fool’s stead,

When no one’s even looking.

Hide-and-seek and disappear,

Forgotten and alone.

There was once someone here,

Whom no one’s ever known.

“No one wants me”, was said,

Somewhere…someplace.

There’s something missing in the head,

That time can not replace.

Hide-and-seek and disappear,

Forgotten and alone.

There was once someone here,

Whom no one’s ever known.

K. Aldaya, 1/8/19

Picture: Image from Among the Sleep; https://store.steampowered.com/app/250620/Among_the_Sleep__Enhanced_Edition/

463. Smoke and Mirrors

“It’s all smoke and mirrors”, the illusionist said.

“What lives in the heart also lives in the head”.

“There is no magic to make you stay,

In one place, or just one way.

You are everything you love and hate.

You are the thoughts you contemplate.

You are young and you are old.

You are meek and you are bold.”

“It’s all smoke and mirrors”, the illusionist said.

“What’s true for the heart, is true for the head;

For just ’cause you are living,

Does not mean you aren’t dead.”

K. Aldaya, 12/30/18

462. The Sinner

Pulled apart. I come undone.

From the start I’m forced to run.

Run from one point to another.

I am me and then the other.

Words confound. I spin in place.

I make no sound. My words: they race,…

Inside myself where they collide,

And try to escape to the outside.

Drained and weak. I grip my heart.

I can’t speak. I’m torn apart.

My heart beats, and beats, and beats,

While inside, history repeats.

Pulled apart. I come undone.

Will this fight ever be won?

For as in war, there are no winners.

There are no saints, only sinners.

K. Aldaya, 12/28/18

Picture: https://rightsinfo.org/excluded-schoolchildren-at-serious-risk-of-knife-crime-and-youth-violence/