58. Black Bird

It comes to me in dead of night when dark dreams flood the mind.

A vision of black in mine eye which sends a shiver through the bones;

A vision to horrify.

It dwells on hill cemetery.

Perched on an old oak tree,

Barely to move; never to fly,

Though screams in stinging undertones a loathsome lullaby.

Staring, though more so, glaring…

Haunting. Watching. Stunning the nerves.

No wish it has to fly,

Do anything more than gaze;

A gaze to damnify.

I know that it doth hate me with a passion few have known;

That’s why it resides on high piercing me with it’s cold stare.

In darkness I lie.

Oh cruel, black bird of night release your ghastly hold.

Oh why? Oh why?

Can’t thou fear anothers’ soul?

Forever night is nigh.

K. Aldaya, 4/25/04

Picture: “Her Graveyard” by Gothicolors Donna Snyder; http://fineartamerica.com/featured/her-graveyard-gothicolors-images.html

57. When I’m Gone

When I’m gone the world will go on,

And nothing will notice my absence.

The birds will still sound,

In the mornings, resound,

Singing of lifes’ sweet enchantments.

The sun will still rise in the beauty-vivid skies,

Though I’m lost from it forever.

Years will pass by and not one will cry,

For the spirit that I once was.

Many will come when I am done,

And roll through this lifes’ course.

Never in seeing my faded being,

From many long years past.

Only a shadow, imprinted though;

Glimpsed as a daydreams’ phantom.

K. Aldaya, 4/22/04

Picture: Bachelor’s Grove Ghost Photo Taken in 1991 on an investigation by the Ghost Research Society using infrared film; http://graveyards.com/IL/Cook/bachelors/ghost3813x.jpg

56. The Freak Inside

In my mind I’m not fit to be anything that you might see.

I’ll never belong with my own and will be forever ‘lone.

I know when people look at me they see the freak that I be.

I try to hide what I am, but I always fail their exam.

I can feel their hate and disgust, for me, whom they distrust.

K. Aldaya, 4/15/04

Picture: Photographer Unknown; http://a.wattpad.net/cover/3283593-256-k508337.jpg

55. Back and Forth Living

Back and forth. Back and forth.

The winds hit the trees;

Winds from the North,

More than a breeze.

Tiny clouds. Tiny clouds.

Are all that is there.

Tiny sky shrouds,

Winded near bare.

Blue skies. Blue skies.

Allow for sun’s warm to glorify,

The planets’ form.

Today now. Today now.

This place seems happy,

‘Gods’ great endow,

To you and to me.

A moment. A moment.

Is all it can bring.

All sin descends,

My heart can’t sing.

Reality. Reality.

Returns here once more.

New gravity.

I hit the floor.

K. Aldaya, 3/22/04

Picture: “Zero Gravity Series” by Nikolay Tikhomirov; http://www.123inspiration.com/zero-gravity-surreal-photos-of-women-floating-by-nikolay-tikhomirov/

54. The Cliff

I stand at the edge,

Trying to stand firm.

Stand at this ledge,

To live out this term.

I feel my feet,

Half off this cliff.

The darkness I’ll meet,

If I loosen this stiff.

Sky black as coal.

Hear all the shadows,

Behind me in whole,

Sending cold-blows.

They poke and prod me,

At all the hours.

They won’t let me be,

With their mean powers.

They’ve forced me over,

With hands I hang.

The shadows, they were, laughing; the whole gang.

Taunting at my struggle,

With sweat on brow.

Between hands I juggle,

To keep hold…, but how?

Their cold, cruel ways,

Pushed me o’er.

On my heart it weighs,

Their ruthlessness galore.

Why can’t they see that I’m slipping?

They care not of me,

And that I’ve no gripping.

I’ve got to be tough,

Never let them know.

That I’ve not enough,

To resist their flow.

K. Aldaya, 3/20/04

Picture: from Dark Shadows; http://www.awn.com/vfxworld/mpc-takes-bite-out-dark-shadows