607. Already Gone

I don’t miss you.

I miss what could have been.

If you were different.

If pride hadn’t gotten in the way.

If you hadn’t always been absent.

For even when there,

You were always somewhere else.

There were things more important,

Then family, fondness, and connection.

Life’s flow and time are insignificant,

To those already gone.

K. Aldaya, 2/2/23

Picture: By Daniel Jensen on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/tCyyySlFNZs

518. Underground

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How am I supposed to live,

When no one is willing to accept,

The entirety of my soul?

Every piece of me, broken, is swept…

Under the rug. I’ll never be whole.

How am I supposed to feel,

When society calls me a lie?

And says the face is what is real,

And not the inner voices who cry.

How am I supposed to trust,

When there’s no one fighting on my side?

I’ve learned the judge is far less cruel,

When the truth is denied,…and we hide.

I may be insane, yet I’m no fool.

How am I supposed to live,

When condemned,…buried,…forgotten?

One cannot live when they’re not free.

So I spend my days with paper and pen,

Writing my own wistful elegy,…

That no one will understand.

K. Aldaya, 6/21/20

Picture: https://www.inverse.com/article/7543-how-do-you-die-when-you-re-buried-alive

512. Forgotten

We’ll never belong anywhere,

‘Cause we were not let in.

The world forgot that we were here,

And left us all alone.

We’ll never get to live or age,

‘Cause time passed long ago.

The world turns another page,

And we’re nothing but a tale…

Another ancient story,

To be told, and then forgot.

For the world says we are history,

And only we know, we are not.

K. Aldaya, 02/25/20

Picture: By Danny G on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/l2NRQNkQ2Qk

494. Autumnmous

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In the fields of youth I wandered alone,

Through the veil of night, in search of home;

And though time passes forgetting today,

I’ve still found no place to stay.

Fall comes again, yet never left;

And the ghosts’ whispers leave me bereft.

I am still alive, though dead.

Tell me: Where is the past to rest it’s head?

I walk among the falling leaves.

Every tree cries out and grieves,

For what is gone may ne’er return,

And what is known we can’t unlearn.

In the fields of youth I wander alone,

Through the veil of night, in search of home.

Time left me and will ne’er reappear.

Now I’m a ghost, yet I am still here…

Eternally haunting the present;

And no one notices that I’m absent.

So I wander alone looking for home.

I am a child, though my body is grown.

Time keeps on moving forgetting today.

Yesterday’s gone, and there’s no place to stay.

K. Aldaya, 10/6/19

Picture: By: Daiga Ellaby on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/HwZQGB-ZjG4

480. Go

You try to meet me half-way,

But I’m not there. I’m all the way.

Too far away. Who would go?

You can’t reach me.

You can not know.

You try to meet me half-way,

But I’m not there. I’m all the way.

Time rode away so long ago.

The sun, it set,

Then came the snow.

You try to meet me half-way,

But I’m not there. I’m all the way.

Gone. Frozen in time…afar.

I can not move,

To where you are.

You try to meet me half-way,

But I’m not there. I’m all the way.

Too far away. Who would go,

To where I am?

With other places to go?

Life stops for no one, so I hope you know.

I don’t want you to stay.

I want you to go.

K. Aldaya, 5/31/19

Picture: By: James Hammond on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/alflch2BrgM