258. I Cannot Move

I,…I cannot move.

I peer into a little house,

A house I’ve seen before.

Am I alive? How’s it therefore?

If I do not move?

I,…I cannot move.

I cry inside, but no one hears,

Or can see, what-there hides.

In the small house of homicides.

Cannot make a move.

I,…I cannot move.

I feel that you are near to me,

Though I cannot reply.

For in that house I’m killed and die,

Never more to move.

I,…I cannot move.

I peer and see my fear and freeze…

In time,…I can’t escape,

Or my spirit run from its’ rape.

I,…I cannot move.

Shake and wake me from this nightmare.

I long to feel secure.

Oh, please hold me and reassure.

For, I cannot move.

I,…I cannot move.

Rescue me from this little house,

Cover my bloody eyes.

Tell me all those sights are just lies.

(I beg! I want to live!)

Please help me to move!

K. Aldaya, 02/03/14

Picture: from “Missing You” in ockoala’s photobucket; http://s966.photobucket.com/user/ockoala/media/Missing%20You/MY9mp4_000725491.jpg.html

244. Black & White

Black and white.

Cold and fright.

In the dark….it’s cold.

On the face………….it’s white!

Black and white.

Cold and fright.

In the night,….the dark and light,

Give-in to the fears in flight,

From the memories: ………..black and white.

K. Aldaya, 7/24/13

Picture: Kim JaeJoong; Photographer Unknown; http://media.tumblr.com/155765ee66440f1dc78a2fd4ebdd547b/tumblr_inline_mg07nbSWHu1qeptf3.jpg

Kim Jae Joong

238. Inside My Head

Inside my head.

A couch. A bed.

A world. A dream.

In my head. In my head.

Inside my head.

A girl. A ghost.

One hiding. One host.

In my head. In my head.

Inside my head.

She’s tortured. She’s dead.

Over and over…

In my head. In my head.

Inside my head.

A shadow. A man,

With perverse plan.

In my head. In my head.

Inside my head.

He haunts. He hunts.

He torments. He affronts.

In my head. In my head.

Inside my head.

A blackness. A shape.

A darkness. A rape.

In my head. In my head.

Inside my head.

A demon. A hell.

Fear; despair dwell,

In my head. In my head.

Inside my head.

As I lie down in bed.

Wake to the dread…

In my head…

…..In my head.

K. Aldaya, 04/25/13

Picture: by Gary Heller; http://www.garyhellerphotography.com/album/abandoned-places?p=1#25

142. Broken Toy

Why is it when you’re near my heart becomes rigid with fear?

Your presence makes me fall back into myself with tear;

Screams descend with minds’-call.

Why is it when you’re here my life progresses disappear,

Into resonant past?

And yet I try to persevere by destroying the cast.

Why is it you appear to chaos my soul with endear?

What did you do to place the horrors of each life-year onto your aging face?

Why is it when you’re near my solitude is made severe?

–Lose everything again–

On my eyes a bloody-smear becomes a perm’nent stain.

Why is it when you’re here distant pain-memories appear?

Cannot escape them now,

Not now, or ever my dear,

For that you won’t allow!

Why is it you appear to float within the hostage-drear,

And love what you destroy?

For with murderous domineer you break your favorite toy.

K. Aldaya, 5/26/05

Picture: American McGee’s Alice 2: Madness Returns; http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m160r1FDr61qcr9a8o1_500.png

130. Out of Range Change

Why hope in vain for things to change?

When all signs and sights contradict.

Hope, love, and happiness…,

All just out of range.

Why hope for sleep in nightmares’ lair,

When fear is all that can be felt?

Can’t trust any truths seen,

For honor these days is rare.

So why hope in vain for a change?

When nothing ever has or will?

No trust can be found,

When all is out of range.

K. Aldaya, 3/10/05

Picture: Powder: Sean Patrick Flanery as Jeremy “Powder” Reed; http://www.moviefancentral.com/images/pictures/review41174/Powder__001.jpg?1364269808