523. Put on the Mask

“Put on the mask!

It’s okay if it’s hard.

You’ll learn to love pain.

Death by suicide’s better,

Than a virus strain!

Put on the mask!

No one cares if you die,

Unless it is Covid,

Then, “It’s tragic!”, they cry.

Put on the mask!

It’s not a right to breathe.

If we want you to suffer…

You’ll go along…..Put it on!

Comply: “Yes, Sir!”

Put on the mask!

So death can not find you.”

(Though no one can offer such a guarantee)

Yet, with the states hands o’er your face,

It makes it hard to see,

All the people dying, internally.

K. Aldaya, 8/4/20

Picture: By Tai’s Captures on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/Lhb-zwQ-QGI

511. Rollercoaster

Life’s a rollercoaster,

That I don’t get to ride.

I am stuck upon the tracks,

With nowhere to run, or hide.

I hear people laughing,

As they go about their day…

Talking…moving…experiencing…

Fun and joy along the way;

While I ponder what it’s like,

To live instead of survive,

Without fear of being hurt,

Simply for being alive?

I yell, though there’s no help.

Some suffer, while others enjoy.

My pain won’t stop the ride of life,

From continuing to run and destroy.

Life’s a rollercoaster,

That I don’t get to ride;

Instead, I lie upon the tracks,

Knowing that soon I will die;

And my body fall through the cracks…

…Unnoticed.

K. Aldaya, 2/20/20

Picture: By Tore Odiin on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/qhJwkgRl9Hg

476. Places to Go

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I long to escape,

Yet I’ve nowhere to go.

My heart lies on the ground,

Covered over with snow.

I long to fly up…

Upon the winds, and free,

Instead at the window,

I dream of being me.

I long to return,

To the sun and the earth,

Where I feel warm and light,

And every breath has worth.

I long to escape,

Though I’ve nowhere to go;

Yet when winter is gone,

Do not find me and sow.

Please spread my dust out,

I have places to go.

K. Aldaya, 5/21/19

Picture: By: Ross Sneddon on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/-_GA1e-813o

414. You Do Not Have to Die

I didn’t want to die when I swallowed all those pills.

I didn’t want to die when I climbed those lofty hills.

I didn’t want to die when I tied that rope on tight.

I didn’t want to die when I climbed that towers’ height.

I didn’t want to die when I loaded that old gun.

I didn’t want to die, yet what is done, is done.

I swallowed all those pills, and climbed those lofty hills;

And tied that rope on tight, and jumped off from that height.

And I loaded that old gun, for there wasn’t anyone,…to say:

“You do not have to die! It doesn’t have to be this way.”

I see you there with all those pills. I see you climbing hills.

I see that you purchased that rope and have no sense of hope.

I see that you are walking up the stairs to the top.

I see that gun, “Put it down. Put it down. Stop!”

You do not have to die, my friend.

This should not be your end.

I see you. I see you…and all that pain within you.

Please put down those pills, and walk beyond those hills.

Unknot that rope. There’s still hope. There’s still hope!

Lay down that gun, and in the morn we’ll watch the sun,…

As it peeks o’er the line ‘tween night and day,

We’ll sit and watch the start of another earthly day;

And laugh, and cry, and hope together,

Under the ethereal clouds we gather,…

And fashion into dreams.

K. Aldaya, 10/4/17

Picture: https://www.wallpaperflare.com/brown-rocky-mountain-during-sunrise-photo-rophaien-wallpaper-17362

357. Sleep

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You always sleep when I cry,

And one day you will when I lie…

in a coffin: the bed of the cursed.

Remember you shunned my pain first!

You always ignore when I bleed,

And don’t bother to stop and take heed.

Blades listen much sharper than you.

Isn’t blood now on your hands too?

You always disregard my words…

They drift onto paper like cowards;

Afraid to take to the air,

And be blown away without a care.

You always sleep when I cry,

And one day when I up and die.

Remember I told you I would.

Living: Tell me why I should!

K. Aldaya, 6/15/16

Picture: Originally posted by Doreese on Tumblr; http://favim.com/image/47601/