518. Underground

help

How am I supposed to live,

When no one is willing to accept,

The entirety of my soul?

Every piece of me, broken, is swept…

Under the rug. I’ll never be whole.

How am I supposed to feel,

When society calls me a lie?

And says the face is what is real,

And not the inner voices who cry.

How am I supposed to trust,

When there’s no one fighting on my side?

I’ve learned the judge is far less cruel,

When the truth is denied,…and we hide.

I may be insane, yet I’m no fool.

How am I supposed to live,

When condemned,…buried,…forgotten?

One cannot live when they’re not free.

So I spend my days with paper and pen,

Writing my own wistful elegy,…

That no one will understand.

K. Aldaya, 6/21/20

Picture: https://www.inverse.com/article/7543-how-do-you-die-when-you-re-buried-alive

517. Empty Graves Without Name

mask_bw_monochrome_124766_3840x2400

There is a tall castle,

It looks lovely from the top.

The tower is inviting,

So passersby often go up;

To see the sea of green,

And to the fae, raise bounteous cup.

However, this castle,

Is a most sprawling domain,

With levels and rooms galore;

Though no one wanders without aim,

As each window and door,

Is locked with keys of their own name.

And each key rests below,

In the haunted dungeon halls,

Where the screams of yesterdays,

Still echo through the walls themselves;

And the terrors from those days,

Remain undusted on its’ shelves.

Thence, who would travel forth,

To seek out the truths within?

When blue skies are so pleasant;

And nature moves in expansion,

Adorning the present….

Burying tales without description.

Empty graves, without name.

K. Aldaya, 5/18/20

Picture: Originally by Evan Mitchell on Flickr;
https://wallpaperscraft.com/download/mask_bw_monochrome_124766/3840×2400

515. No Apologies

I will not apologize for wanting to live.

I may be a burden on people that I know.

Yet, just because I am different,

Doesn’t mean that I should go.

I will not apologize for wanting to live.

Knock me down, and I will get right back up again,

‘Cause I don’t care if others like me.

They can go their own way then.

I will not apologize for wanting to live.

It’s only natural instinct to fight to survive;

Even tonic immobility,

Is a means to stay alive.

I will not apologize for wanting to live.

People may believe that my life is not worth it,

Though no matter what others may say,

I am not willing to quit…

And yes, I’ve just as much right to stay.

K. Aldaya, 4/19/20

Picture: By Liam Burnett-Blue on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/-qwEUsg7UbI

514. Smile

Sit with me awhile,

As the walls collapse around us;

For I live to see you smile,

And the chaos can not touch us,

When hearts so pleasantly beguile.

Let’s sit hand-in-hand,

And remember, as we gaze…

Into another land,

That all time is but a phase;

And life and death: unplanned.

So sit with me tonight.

Let us go away together,

Where the sun is shining bright,

And we can always be together.

Hold me close, and hold on tight.

Sit with me awhile…For I….

…..I live to see you smile.

K. Aldaya, 3/17/20

Picture: By Reed Naliboff on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/ukaHRDJ-ics

513. Salvage

To the world I’m nothing more than trash,

To be tossed away…

Devoid of value.

Nothing lost. Nothing to say.

I know I have value, though no one tries,

To pick me up and see,

Something of worth…

A shred of humanity.

The world threw me away without care,

And without my consent;

So I wonder what could’ve been,

If I hadn’t been absent?

If someone had noticed my absence and found,

That I could be,

Something of value,

For beyond entropy…

Comes a measure of hope.

K. Aldaya, 3/10/20

Picture: By Jordan Beltran on Unsplash; https://unsplash.com/photos/AxdlcxaModc