36. The Door

The door is open to another place,

Where you can run and veil your face.

You’re free to enter for your escape,

But it’s lined on the bottom with red tape.

Leave from here to go over there,

And the tape between worlds starts to wear.

Each time is harder to return from,

Making your glimpse of realities numb.

Run through the door to hide,

And enter an emptiness far and wide.

There’s the door if you wish to fare,

Sometimes there’s just too much to bear.

K. Aldaya, 9/21/03

Picture: Artist Unknown; http://pictures.4ever.eu/cartoons/digital-art/doors-in-the-field-154563

35. The Past Forever

Here we are on this new morn,

We wish knowledge may be born;

To the past forever on its’ way,

To find the night and lose the day.

We want to change some things,

A choice can’t take back what it brings.

For the past is forever on its’ way,

To find the night and lose the day.

But alas with each new suns’ ray,

We are given a recreated day,

To make the best of in every way.

K. Aldaya, 2/24/04

Picture: Photographer Unknown; http://www.thecampuscompanion.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/beautiful_sunrise_on_green_meadow.jpg

34. Me and I

“Me”, said I. “I have some questions to ask. Do you think you can handle the task?”

Well, just go ahead.

“Why do you wish to be dead”?

“Do you feel somehow unfit”?

There is no forgiveness I can give myself,

Though a ‘God’ can forgive and put me top-shelf.

My guilt is of my origin and of my sin.

That is why I cannot die,

‘Cause my faults would fall on some other guy.

That isn’t the way it should work, I’m the jerk!

I deserve to be punished.

Only me.

So I have to live for now to, to repent, don’t you see?

K. Aldaya, 4/23/03

Picture: Photographer Unknown; http://2.bp.blogspot.com/–ydY9rQvOxI/ULQ5VxTYYtI/AAAAAAAAOrk/zS4KfHsX7B0/s640/Girl+in+Mirror+%283%29.jpg

33. I Will Stand Alone

I will stand alone with all I’ve known,

For my life is for me,

For only my eyes to see.

I have stood alone with each cry and moan,

Trying hard to forget,

Leaving residue of regret.

I now stand alone with the creaking of each bone.

I try to speak and release, feeling wrong in wanting peace.

I will stand alone ’cause no one’s on my phone,

For I don’t know how to be free,

To express my agony.

I have stood alone with each cry and moan,

For I’m guilty for my feelings,

For feeling my heart’s in peelings.

I now stand alone with all I have known,

For my life is for me.

For me, to see, and be.

K. Aldaya, 3/30/03

Picture: Artist Unknown; http://www.survival2020.com/wp-content/uploads/lonely-skeleton-survivor.jpg

32. Love?

Love?

Sometimes I feel I know what it is, but really I have no clue what it ’tis.

Only through dreams of fancy and thought, can we see how true love is sought.

Reality leaves little space for such, though love is needed in it so much.

With practicality and toughness people shrink their hearts to less and less.

They think only of their plights and selves, while there are many trapped in frozen cells.

Trapped in a cold and bitter world, where love is something kept up furled.

Love? It won’t be found until people see how horrible and cold they can be.

Too caught up in their daily routines to ever know what love truly means.

K. Aldaya, 10/17/03

Picture: Photographer Unknown; http://lakeshagadson.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/one-lonely-person-in-crowd.jpg